Sophronia Nepthys

I encourage you to read my About Me page prior to reading any post on my blog.  I find it's important to know who is writing here, so that you can understand her point of view a bit more clearly.

When I went to my public library, I got three books on feminism, two about The Suffragist Movement (since this is where the feminist movement truly started), and one that entails 'the positive woman vs. the femlib fanatics'.  While I was there, I remembered a book that had caught my eye when I was waiting to use one of their internet computers.  This book is called The Surrendered Wife by Laura Doyle.  It's a book that is self-described as:

"a practical guide to finding intimacy, passion and peace with a man."

and described by John Gray (author of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus) as:

"a practical and valuable tool for women wanting to regain intimacy in their relationships."

At the beginning of Chapter 13 in her book, Laura quotes Francis Picabia who said:

"Nature is unfair?  So much the better, inequality is the only bearable thing.  The monotony of equality can only lead us to boredom."

She then adds this in her own words:

"Instead of throwing out traditional gender roles, try them on again.  There may be some value in them that you would like to reclaim.  They can help you feel protected and feminine, and therefore more intimate.
Practice 'changing your hat' when you leave work.  A surrendered wife can be a force to be reckoned with at work and a soft, gentle woman in marriage, as long as she surrenders when she comes home."

I started this blog, because I firmly believe that there is middle ground in the area of feminism.  One extreme being that time before the suffragists like Lucy Stone, Susan B. Anthony, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Frances Willard, and Alice Paul decided to dedicate their lives at the cost of their personal lives to fight for women's rights.  The other extreme being the emasculation of men, and the insane desire for extreminists to be more like men than women in every single area.  The middle ground is what Laura Doyle is advocating in her book.

On a person note, while I've thoroughly enjoyed what I've read in Laura's book thus far, and find myself nodding in sincere agreement to many of the things she says, I'd like to put my own little spin on it, because that's what my blog is really all about, now isn't it?  I'm nothing if not absolutely honest in my agenda here.

I am a submissive woman, and I am submissive to my Sir, because of the overwhelming love I have for him.  I live every single day of my life knowing exactly what my value is to my Sir, and being unshakably confident in the width, depth, and height of the love he feels for me.  Laura has this quiz in the front of her book to determine the level of intimacy currently in your marriage.  There are 20 questions about things that you do in your marriage, to which you choose Rarely, Sometimes or Frequently.  For an answer of Rarely, you gave yourself 5 points, Sometimes was worth 3 points, and Frequently was worth 1 point, so your total would be anywhere between 20 and 100.  I answered all but one question with Rarely (only because she didn't include the option of Never), save for one.  This question asked me if I do things for him that he's capable of doing for himself.  My response was Frequently, which resulted in me scoring 96 points instead of 100.  I answered this question in all honesty, because I do many things for my Sir that he's quite capable of doing for himself.  The reason that I do this, isn't because I'm trying to send him a message that I don't think he can do those things.  On the contrary.  Sir knows what his limitations are, and is quite honest about them.  So while I do a great many things he can do himself, it's because he believes that I always do a much better job at these things, and that is an area of pride for me.  I love doing those things for him, because I love him, and because of the great confidence he's instilled in me to be able to do these things better than he can.  He doesn't at all feel emasculated by the fact that I'll refill his drink if he's busy, make him something to eat because he doesn't have the time to do it himself, or take off his boots when he gets home after a hard day at work.  He cherishes the spirit in which I do these things for him.  It is because of my spirit that he continues to love me, and there is absolutely no lack of intimacy in our relationship.

That is all for now, my lovelies.